There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
So many bounce houses so little time
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
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