Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
