Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Randomize
