There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize
