Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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