he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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