Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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