i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
