I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
