Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
