I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Randomize
