The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
