ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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