Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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