get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
