i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
