I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
