You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
