I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Randomize
