So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
