it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
