I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
