even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I deserve this hangover.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize