So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
