I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
It was like getting head from an anaconda
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Sext me about skeletons
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
