Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
