big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
