I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
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