I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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