And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
