I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
