when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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