Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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