YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
