Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
