I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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