i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
