So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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