I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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