last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize