Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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