I hate all girls vehemently.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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