Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
