cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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