for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
