Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
