David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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