yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
