Say something about gay babies.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
