dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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