People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
