Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
